He is risen?

[Dancefortwo]

And then there are the parts that are like how the Jedi and Superman just randomly forget about 90% of the superpowers they have.  (Oh, hey, there are enemy bots on the side of my spaceship tearing apart my droid, too bad I can't do anything about that from in here, it's not like I have telekinesis... why are you looking at me funny?)  Hey, God, did you ever just try snapping Your omnipotent Fingers and getting rid of sin like that?  I'm sure omniscience would let You find some way of doing that which is compatible with free will, if You care about that, which the Old Testament makes pretty clear You don't.

(God forgets He's omnipotent is the best non-atheistic explanation for the iron chariots that I can think of.)

That reminds me of Mary forgetting all about the Angel Gabriel appearing in her bedroom and telling her that she was going to have the son of a god which is a pretty fucking amazing event!  But then when Jesus is 12  he wanders off she and Joseph are frantically looking for pre-teen Jesus when she find him in the Hebrew temple talking with rabbis with wisdom far beyond his years and she's astonished and amazed.  
  
This is from Luke:

  “Why were you searching for me?” he asked. “Didn’t you know I had to be in my Father’s house?”  But they (Joseph and Mary) did not understand what he was saying to them.

Ummmm, so I guess an angel popping into her room and magically impregnating her with a god baby wasn't a big deal and not all that memorable.   



Bolding is mine.

[Minimalist]

That reminds me of Mary forgetting all about the Angel Gabriel appearing in her bedroom and telling her that she was going to have the son of a god which is a pretty fucking amazing event!  But then when Jesus is 12  he wanders off she and Joseph are frantically looking for pre-teen Jesus when she find him in the Hebrew temple talking with rabbis with wisdom far beyond his years and she's astonished and amazed. 

So, D42, have you ever read this from Josephus' autobiography?  Written c. 95 CE.

https://penelope.uchicago.edu/josephus/autobiog.html

In case you were wondering where the jesus freaks came up with that story about the godboy in the temple.

I was my self brought up with my brother, whose name was Matthias: for he was my own brother, by both father and mother; and I made mighty proficiency in the improvements of my learning; and appeared to have both a great memory, and understanding. Moreover, when I was a child, and about fourteen years of age, I was commended by all for the love I had to learning; on which account the High Priests, and principal men of the city came then frequently to me together, in order to know my opinion about the accurate understanding of points of the law.

Of course if Josephus was impressing the fucking priests at 14 then the godboy had to do it at 12.

[Rahn127]

I think everyone forgets that Leroy Jenkins in 2000 BC sacrificed himself and many others when he went solo into a dangerous cave to battle the seven deadly sins.

It was his sacrifice that saved us all.

[Dancefortwo]

So, D42, have you ever read this from Josephus' autobiography?  Written c. 95 CE.

https://penelope.uchicago.edu/josephus/autobiog.html

In case you were wondering where the jesus freaks came up with that story about the godboy in the temple.



Of course if Josephus was impressing the fucking priests at 14 then the godboy had to do it at 12.

I've posted this before and easter seems to be a good time to post it again.  This is the Mocking of Carabbas by Philo of Alexandria who wrote thie years before the New testament writers wrote about the mocking and beating of Jesus. 

 There was a certain madman named Carabbas.  This man spent all this days and nights naked in the roads, minding neither cold nor heat, the sport of idle children and wanton youths; and they, driving the poor wretch as far as the public gymnasium, and setting him up there on high that he might be seen by everybody, flattened out a leaf of papyrus and put it on his head instead of a diadem, and clothed the rest of his body with a common door mat instead of a cloak and instead of a scepter they put in his hand a small stick of the native papyrus which they found lying by the way side and gave to him.   And when, like actors in theatrical spectacles, he had received all the insignia of royal authority, and had been dressed and adorned like a king, the young men bearing sticks on their shoulders stood on each side of him instead of spear-bearers, in imitation of the bodyguards of the king, and then others came up, some as if to salute him, and others making as though they wished to plead their causes before him, and others pretending to wish to consult with him about the affairs of the state.

 Then from the multitude of those who were standing around there arose a wonderful shout of men calling out “Maris”; and this is the name by which it is said that they call the kings among the Syrians; for they knew that Agrippa was by birth a Syrian, and also that he was possessed of a great district of Syria of which he was the sovereign.

This is what is written in Mark about the mocking of Jesus several decades later.  

 And they clothed him with purple, and platted a crown of thorns, and put it about his head, And began to salute him, Hail, King of the Jews! And they smote him on the head with a reed, and did spit upon him, and bowing their knees worshipped him. And when they had mocked him, they took off the purple from him, and put his own clothes on him, and led him out to crucify him. 

Christians poured over Philo's works and used his concept of Logos in their new religion.   It's hard to believe they didn't read the mocking of Carabbas and think it was perfect for their Jesus guy too.    

[Minimalist]

Josephus has this version of (yet) another jesus.  Note how the actions of the Roman Procurator - Albinus - (at least Josephus, unlike "Tacitus" got the title right!) mimic Pilate in many respects in the trial sequence.

Here is the passage about Jesus ben Ananus in Josephus' Jewish Wars 6, 5, 3:

"But, what is still more terrible, there was one Jesus, the son of Ananus, a plebeian and a husbandman, who, four years before the war began, and at a time when the city was in very great peace and prosperity, came to that feast whereon it is our custom for every one to make tabernacles to God in the temple, began on a sudden to cry aloud, "A voice from the east, a voice from the west, a voice from the four winds, a voice against Jerusalem and the holy house, a voice against the bridegrooms and the brides, and a voice against this whole people!" This was his cry, as he went about by day and by night, in all the lanes of the city.

However, certain of the most eminent among the populace had great indignation at this dire cry of his, and took up the man, and gave him a great number of severe stripes; yet did not he either say any thing for himself, or any thing peculiar to those that chastised him, but still went on with the same words which he cried before. Hereupon our rulers, supposing, as the case proved to be, that this was a sort of divine fury in the man, brought him to the Roman procurator, where he was whipped till his bones were laid bare; yet he did not make any supplication for himself, nor shed any tears, but turning his voice to the most lamentable tone possible, at every stroke of the whip his answer was, "Woe, woe to Jerusalem!" And when Albinus (for he was then our procurator) asked him, Who he was? and whence he came? and why he uttered such words? he made no manner of reply to what he said, but still did not leave off his melancholy ditty, till Albinus took him to be a madman, and dismissed him.

Now, during all the time that passed before the war began, this man did not go near any of the citizens, nor was seen by them while he said so; but he every day uttered these lamentable words, as if it were his premeditated vow, "Woe, woe to Jerusalem!" Nor did he give ill words to any of those that beat him every day, nor good words to those that gave him food; but this was his reply to all men, and indeed no other than a melancholy presage of what was to come. This cry of his was the loudest at the festivals; and he continued this ditty for seven years and five months, without growing hoarse, or being tired therewith, until the very time that he saw his presage in earnest fulfilled in our siege, when it ceased; for as he was going round upon the wall, he cried out with his utmost force, "Woe, woe to the city again, and to the people, and to the holy house!" And just as he added at the last, "Woe, woe to myself also!" there came a stone out of one of the engines, and smote him, and killed him immediately; and as he was uttering the very same presages he gave up the ghost."

Of course, the jesusists had to have their boy be killed so they had Pilate famously tell the mob he's washing his hands of the matter.  That way they could blame the jews as has been done off and on ever since.

[SYZ]

I baked three little souffles this afternoon.

Only one was risen; the other two fell flat.   

[Minimalist]

Is that the yeast of your problems?

[Bucky Ball]

I baked three little souffles this afternoon.

Only one was risen; the other two fell flat.   

You forgot the incantation, as you close the oven.

[skyking]

<Entered the thread looking for bread and yeast references, not disappointed.

[Dānu]

[Kim]

"And what of Lazarus?" ...
That's an exact, end-tag quote by Captain James T Kirk of the starship Enterprise.
A fictional character, referring to a fictional character, which alludes to a fictional character, in a somewhat ubiquitous tale, which some people think is "historically based".

Fact. Story.
Shit. Shinola.

Humans get so caught up in their own minds. I'm often surprised they can even discern which way is up.

We do so love our entertainments.

[adey67]

I don't know about Jesus but I'm pretty sure the Pilsbury Doughboy is risen he certainly looks risen.

[Minimalist]

Yup!

[Free]

So here's what I don't get about the whole Jesus-as-perfect-sacrifice thing.

(Correction: one of the MANY things I don't get about it.)


In a (pretty common, though I think not universal) Christian view, Jesus's death was a sacrifice of such a perfect, flawless, superfluous quality that it sufficed to absolve all humanity of sin in accordance with (or at least akin to) the rules for sacrificial offerings in Leviticus.

But Leviticus was also very clear that offerings had to be WITHOUT yeast.

So how is Jesus risen?   

...

(NOT serious.  Just a bit of fun for Yeaster Sunday.)

No.

He's dead Jim, and the fucker better stay that way.

[mordant]

I don't see forgiving as deciding to associate again with someone who harmed me or others.

I see it as getting rid of the bad feelings I harbor.  When I forgive, it's to lift a weight off me, not off the wrong doer. I see it as a final chapter in my life for that story. No more getting worked up over that asshole.

I agree. Forgiveness is a separate issue from trust. You can release your own stewing over some abuse or offense but that doesn't mean you are delusional about whether the person will do that to you again, given the opportunity.

It's as if some people think you have to prove you've forgiven by developing amnesia about what the person did and is still capable of doing.

If the offender is genuinely contrite and changes their thinking about the wrongness of what they did, accepts responsibility, etc., THEN and only then you might BEGIN to rebuild trust.

[Dancefortwo]

Speaking of "risen", here is a portrait titled, "Portrait of a Woman of the Hofer Family", dated around 1470.   No one knows who this woman is or who painted it but if you take a closer look you'll notice that she has a fly on her poufed up headdress.  There are many theories for the fly being on an otherwise pristine and carefully painted portrait of an upper class lady but MY theory is that the artist painted it and didn't get paid. The woman stiffed the poor artist so the artist went back and painted that damned fly on her hat for retribution.   

"Take this fly and shove it, you cheap bitch!"




That's my theory.  

This has absolutely nothing to do with the thread.  

[Minimalist]

Mike Pence had a similar problem!

[Kim]

Speaking of "risen", here is a portrait titled, "Portrait of a Woman of the Hofer Family", dated around 1470.   No one knows who this woman is or who painted it but if you take a closer look you'll notice that she has a fly on her poufed up headdress.  There are many theories for the fly being on an otherwise pristine and carefully painted portrait of an upper class lady but MY theory is that the artist painted it and didn't get paid. The woman stiffed the poor artist so the artist went back and painted that damned fly on her hat for retribution.   

"Take this fly and shove it, you cheap bitch!"




That's my theory.  

This has absolutely nothing to do with the thread.  

I'm going to go out on a limb & say that's a van Meegeren or, some other reputable painter/forger havling fun.
It's certainly got a beautiful & studied qyality.

[Rhythmcs]

Got a mailer from the local megachurch today. Inside I find an eleven point list (with accompanying scriptures) as to how moses and jesus were basically the same person, type antitype style. Isn't god amazing! Now, if it were me, and I was looking to make some more coin off this grift, idk that I'd print the quiet parts out loud like that - but I guess it's working for them.

There was a super creepy "just for fun" section for kids, too. Picture matching. Can you number the plagues in the right order?

[SYZ]

[Dancefortwo]

I'm going to go out on a limb & say that's a van Meegeren or, some other reputable painter/forger havling fun.
 It's certainly got a beautiful & studied qyality.  

According to the National Gallery it was a German painter from the southern school but they can't say for sure who the artist is.  That fly just cracks me up.