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01-12-2021, 03:46 AM
How do you dress when you go out for dinner?
(01-12-2021, 02:51 AM)Dancefortwo Wrote: (01-12-2021, 01:11 AM)Aliza Wrote: As I'm thinking of the subject here, I think what really bothers me are people who dress to be distracting in a negative way.... or people who are too ignorant to realize that their clothing makes others uncomfortable.
I agree. This is not something I would wear to an evening meal at a nice restaurant.
One doesn't have to dress in an Oscar de la Renta evening gown, just be neat and clean and sort of put together. It doesn't take a lot of money to do this either. One time I found a beautifully tailored woman's high end wool suit at the Goodwill when I was putting together some costumes for a play. It was $8 dollars. I snapped it up. But I guess a lot of people don't have the aesthetics that I have. I love beautiful fabrics and classic clothing. Fashion is a big part of my life but I try not to be too snobby about it. I know it's not important to other people.
Yup! This resolves the matter for me. It's not dressing down, it's dressing absurdly that irritates me.
I'm not a fashionista by any stretch of the imagination, but I try to wear clean, stylish, presentable attire that fits the occasion and doesn't draw negative attention my way. I appreciate from others when they return the favor.
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01-12-2021, 04:43 AM
How do you dress when you go out for dinner?
(01-12-2021, 02:51 AM)Dancefortwo Wrote: (01-12-2021, 01:11 AM)Aliza Wrote: As I'm thinking of the subject here, I think what really bothers me are people who dress to be distracting in a negative way.... or people who are too ignorant to realize that their clothing makes others uncomfortable.
I agree. This is not something I would wear to an evening meal at a nice restaurant.
One doesn't have to dress in an Oscar de la Renta evening gown, just be neat and clean and sort of put together. It doesn't take a lot of money to do this either. One time I found a beautifully tailored woman's high end wool suit at the Goodwill when I was putting together some costumes for a play. It was $8 dollars. I snapped it up. But I guess a lot of people don't have the aesthetics that I have. I love beautiful fabrics and classic clothing. Fashion is a big part of my life but I try not to be too snobby about it. I know it's not important to other people.
I truly hope that the person wearing that got paid a ton of money for doing so.
If you get to thinking you’re a person of some influence, try ordering somebody else’s dog around.
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01-12-2021, 05:14 AM
How do you dress when you go out for dinner?
(01-12-2021, 04:43 AM)Fireball Wrote: I truly hope that the person wearing that got paid a ton of money for doing so.
I'm pretty sure they didn't do it for the money. (They did it for the feels!)
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01-12-2021, 11:45 AM
How do you dress when you go out for dinner?
People also have different reasons for going to a nice restaurant. Some go for social reasons, or romance, or just for the feel of the environment.
The only thing that can entice me to go anymore is fresh lobster. I just go for the food. For all I care, they could serve it in a garage on folding tables, I'm all about the flavors of the food. Fresh lobster is the only thing I won't cook myself. But I do enjoy it very much.
That said, I used to enjoy going to little "hole in the wall" restaurants, especially when traveling in other countries. They usually serve authentic food. Some of them were real gems, unpolished, but oh so good. And I usually tipped more at lower priced restaurants, since the waitpersons generally can't make much money working there.
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01-12-2021, 11:15 PM
How do you dress when you go out for dinner?
Urp! What be "eating out"? By now socializing is hardness. Not remember how. Much hair. Forget to wear clothes. Me go pee-pee now. Bye bye!
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01-12-2021, 11:20 PM
How do you dress when you go out for dinner?
(01-11-2021, 03:38 AM)Aliza Wrote: (01-10-2021, 10:32 PM)julep Wrote: (01-10-2021, 09:09 PM)Aliza Wrote: These are both excellent points, @Aroura and @c172.
If someone can not change who they are -like literally cannot change- then obviously discriminating against them is wrong. I'm sorry for whatever extent you have to deal with that, C.
Great...What about the rest of us? I'm just wondering if the rest of people who reveal their membership in the lesser classes by not dressing to requirements, while behaving acceptably in every other respect, get similar consideration?
You seem to be criticizing people, generally, whom you just don't like in terms of personal dress style, not people who are being disruptive yahoos or storming the Capitol, etc. They're sitting in a restaurant, having been admitted to that restaurant by the management, and behaving acceptably, but you feel their clothing choices are somehow disrespectful. To what, exactly? To your line of sight?
Then there's criticism of people going to the theater or ballet, sitting quietly, enjoying and appreciating the performance, but their fricking clothing choices are enough to disqualify them, somehow, from deserving to sit in the same auditorium as the Quality?
If they bought a ticket or paid for their meal and didn't bother you except with their aesthetics, really, what is the deal?
I do think people have a responsibility to behave a certain way in certain spaces. I think when people go to dinner (bearing in mind the context here is dinner), they should conduct themselves in accordance with social norms. It's respectful to meet everyone else on the agreed upon social standard of dress and behavior. One can turn on their TV to see what trends are current.
The thing that inspired this particular thread was an overall downward trend in attire at fancy restaurants. I neglected to mention that the woman who really ticked me off was wearing a puffy jacket and a pair of boy shorts that I swear were just underwear. If these were not swimming suit bottoms, then they could only be underwear. They were certainly thin enough to have been underwear. There was also the knee high boots, overly long, brightly painted fingernails, false eyelashes, and weave on her head. I felt really awkward and uncomfortable, and I was surprised that the restaurant sat her in the dining room like that. I was offended that she felt this attire was perfectly acceptable for a restaurant that plays soft, romantic music and custom makes each dish to order. Clearly it's not a money issue because she could afford the items that she had.
I took it to be either a "fuck you for not liking it," attitude, or a "you're a racist for gaping at me" attitude. Obviously I couldn't know what her intentions were, but her intentions were irrelevant; her actions were that she showed up looking like a hooker. Seeing her was the straw that broke the camel's back. If it had been an isolated thing, I'd have gawked and moved on... but in general, I've noticed people showing up in attire that makes me uncomfortable, and I suspect it makes other diners uncomfortable as well.
Maybe it makes other diners uncomfortable, but the restaurant seems to have no problem with it. Did this experience make you decide never to go to the restaurant again? If not, and if she could afford the experience and behaved appropriately, I’d submit that the restaurant is doing the right thing for its business model.
I’m old enough to have gone to school in an era when a female simply wearing pants in public was considered radically disrespectful, plus I grew up poor, plus I work in a field where we are trying to tear down the gatekeepers who want to limit our audience to the “right” people. I want everybody to hear and love brahms and bach and bartok, and the aesthetics of my audience...I truly don’t give a shit. Thousands of performances in...there is no difference of response based on clothes choices. The response and the access are the important things.
I suspect this is one of those things that differ from human to human. I just can’t really ever call to mind an occasion when someone else’s clothing choices have made myself feel uncomfortable or diminished my experience of a meal or play or concert or art exhibit, etc. It’s sad that this seems to take away so much from your enjoyment of an experience.
god, ugh
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01-12-2021, 11:27 PM
How do you dress when you go out for dinner?
It all depends on whether one goes to a place just for what it offers as far as music, performance, food, whatever. Or whether one goes to revel in a certain ambience.
When I grew up, too, dress codes were strict. Being properly and fashionably dressed was key to lots of things, and, yes, pants on a woman were scandalous.
Perhaps it is why I am so oblivious to fashion, I was rebelling against it back then. Now I just don't care.
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01-13-2021, 02:17 AM
How do you dress when you go out for dinner?
I just look after my own bidness, and so long as someone is not inflicting themselves on me I don't really worry about their dress.
On hiatus.
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01-13-2021, 02:29 AM
How do you dress when you go out for dinner?
(01-12-2021, 11:20 PM)julep Wrote: (01-11-2021, 03:38 AM)Aliza Wrote: (01-10-2021, 10:32 PM)julep Wrote: Great...What about the rest of us? I'm just wondering if the rest of people who reveal their membership in the lesser classes by not dressing to requirements, while behaving acceptably in every other respect, get similar consideration?
You seem to be criticizing people, generally, whom you just don't like in terms of personal dress style, not people who are being disruptive yahoos or storming the Capitol, etc. They're sitting in a restaurant, having been admitted to that restaurant by the management, and behaving acceptably, but you feel their clothing choices are somehow disrespectful. To what, exactly? To your line of sight?
Then there's criticism of people going to the theater or ballet, sitting quietly, enjoying and appreciating the performance, but their fricking clothing choices are enough to disqualify them, somehow, from deserving to sit in the same auditorium as the Quality?
If they bought a ticket or paid for their meal and didn't bother you except with their aesthetics, really, what is the deal?
I do think people have a responsibility to behave a certain way in certain spaces. I think when people go to dinner (bearing in mind the context here is dinner), they should conduct themselves in accordance with social norms. It's respectful to meet everyone else on the agreed upon social standard of dress and behavior. One can turn on their TV to see what trends are current.
The thing that inspired this particular thread was an overall downward trend in attire at fancy restaurants. I neglected to mention that the woman who really ticked me off was wearing a puffy jacket and a pair of boy shorts that I swear were just underwear. If these were not swimming suit bottoms, then they could only be underwear. They were certainly thin enough to have been underwear. There was also the knee high boots, overly long, brightly painted fingernails, false eyelashes, and weave on her head. I felt really awkward and uncomfortable, and I was surprised that the restaurant sat her in the dining room like that. I was offended that she felt this attire was perfectly acceptable for a restaurant that plays soft, romantic music and custom makes each dish to order. Clearly it's not a money issue because she could afford the items that she had.
I took it to be either a "fuck you for not liking it," attitude, or a "you're a racist for gaping at me" attitude. Obviously I couldn't know what her intentions were, but her intentions were irrelevant; her actions were that she showed up looking like a hooker. Seeing her was the straw that broke the camel's back. If it had been an isolated thing, I'd have gawked and moved on... but in general, I've noticed people showing up in attire that makes me uncomfortable, and I suspect it makes other diners uncomfortable as well.
Maybe it makes other diners uncomfortable, but the restaurant seems to have no problem with it. Did this experience make you decide never to go to the restaurant again? If not, and if she could afford the experience and behaved appropriately, I’d submit that the restaurant is doing the right thing for its business model.
I’m old enough to have gone to school in an era when a female simply wearing pants in public was considered radically disrespectful, plus I grew up poor, plus I work in a field where we are trying to tear down the gatekeepers who want to limit our audience to the “right” people. I want everybody to hear and love brahms and bach and bartok, and the aesthetics of my audience...I truly don’t give a shit. Thousands of performances in...there is no difference of response based on clothes choices. The response and the access are the important things.
I suspect this is one of those things that differ from human to human. I just can’t really ever call to mind an occasion when someone else’s clothing choices have made myself feel uncomfortable or diminished my experience of a meal or play or concert or art exhibit, etc. It’s sad that this seems to take away so much from your enjoyment of an experience.
I think not wearing pants is socially inappropriate. -Like literally not wearing pants or a skirt. I'm not sure if I will return to the restaurant. If it was isolated, I'd have gotten over it, but this is a restaurant where go very often and I've noticed a decline in clientele lately. This lady was really over the top and the restaurant didn't seem to have a problem with it. And yes, I do like to surround myself with people who uphold social norms. I think I like the comfort of people behaving in a predictable manner that is within the bounds accepted by most people.
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01-13-2021, 10:24 AM
How do you dress when you go out for dinner?
Restaurants? Meh.
Don't get me started on weddings and funerals.
“Religion is excellent stuff for keeping common people quiet.
Religion is what keeps the poor from murdering the rich.”
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01-13-2021, 09:08 PM
(This post was last modified: 01-13-2021, 09:13 PM by Dancefortwo.)
How do you dress when you go out for dinner?
(01-13-2021, 02:29 AM)Aliza Wrote: (01-12-2021, 11:20 PM)julep Wrote: (01-11-2021, 03:38 AM)Aliza Wrote: I do think people have a responsibility to behave a certain way in certain spaces. I think when people go to dinner (bearing in mind the context here is dinner), they should conduct themselves in accordance with social norms. It's respectful to meet everyone else on the agreed upon social standard of dress and behavior. One can turn on their TV to see what trends are current.
The thing that inspired this particular thread was an overall downward trend in attire at fancy restaurants. I neglected to mention that the woman who really ticked me off was wearing a puffy jacket and a pair of boy shorts that I swear were just underwear. If these were not swimming suit bottoms, then they could only be underwear. They were certainly thin enough to have been underwear. There was also the knee high boots, overly long, brightly painted fingernails, false eyelashes, and weave on her head. I felt really awkward and uncomfortable, and I was surprised that the restaurant sat her in the dining room like that. I was offended that she felt this attire was perfectly acceptable for a restaurant that plays soft, romantic music and custom makes each dish to order. Clearly it's not a money issue because she could afford the items that she had.
I took it to be either a "fuck you for not liking it," attitude, or a "you're a racist for gaping at me" attitude. Obviously I couldn't know what her intentions were, but her intentions were irrelevant; her actions were that she showed up looking like a hooker. Seeing her was the straw that broke the camel's back. If it had been an isolated thing, I'd have gawked and moved on... but in general, I've noticed people showing up in attire that makes me uncomfortable, and I suspect it makes other diners uncomfortable as well.
Maybe it makes other diners uncomfortable, but the restaurant seems to have no problem with it. Did this experience make you decide never to go to the restaurant again? If not, and if she could afford the experience and behaved appropriately, I’d submit that the restaurant is doing the right thing for its business model.
I’m old enough to have gone to school in an era when a female simply wearing pants in public was considered radically disrespectful, plus I grew up poor, plus I work in a field where we are trying to tear down the gatekeepers who want to limit our audience to the “right” people. I want everybody to hear and love brahms and bach and bartok, and the aesthetics of my audience...I truly don’t give a shit. Thousands of performances in...there is no difference of response based on clothes choices. The response and the access are the important things.
I suspect this is one of those things that differ from human to human. I just can’t really ever call to mind an occasion when someone else’s clothing choices have made myself feel uncomfortable or diminished my experience of a meal or play or concert or art exhibit, etc. It’s sad that this seems to take away so much from your enjoyment of an experience.
I think not wearing pants is socially inappropriate. -Like literally not wearing pants or a skirt. I'm not sure if I will return to the restaurant. If it was isolated, I'd have gotten over it, but this is a restaurant where go very often and I've noticed a decline in clientele lately. This lady was really over the top and the restaurant didn't seem to have a problem with it. And yes, I do like to surround myself with people who uphold social norms. I think I like the comfort of people behaving in a predictable manner that is within the bounds accepted by most people.
When I lived in Los Angeles I lived in the Fairfax district which has a large Jewish community and there were 3 or 4 synagogues near my apartment. I used to see people walking to the synagogue nicely dressed. They dressed somberly, there was nothing flashy or bright and colorful but it was always neat and nice. I was fascinated because I noticed none of the ladies ever carried purses and everyone walked instead of drove.
Around Portland there is a large community of Russians. They started coming here in the 90's and several Russian churches were built. I know nothing about the Russian Orthodox Church but I noticed a lot of Russian people walking to church on Saturday so I guess they have a Saturday service. The dress was similar to the Jewish community in that the young ladies were very well dressed but not in bright flashy clothes and the men wore dark suits. The elderly women wore a babushka tied around their head and a rather unflattering dark dress and frumpy shoes. They looked like the typical older Russian peasant I've seen in photos. But I noticed they all walked even in the worst weather.
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01-13-2021, 09:51 PM
How do you dress when you go out for dinner?
(01-13-2021, 09:08 PM)Dancefortwo Wrote: When I lived in Los Angeles I lived in the Fairfax district which has a large Jewish community and there were 3 or 4 synagogues near my apartment. I used to see people walking to the synagogue nicely dressed. They dressed somberly, there was nothing flashy or bright and colorful but it was always neat and nice. I was fascinated because I noticed none of the ladies ever carried purses and everyone walked instead of drove.
Around Portland there is a large community of Russians. They started coming here in the 90's and several Russian churches were built. I know nothing about the Russian Orthodox Church but I noticed a lot of Russian people walking to church on Saturday so I guess they have a Saturday service. The dress was similar to the Jewish community in that the young ladies were very well dressed but not in bright flashy clothes and the men wore dark suits. The elderly women wore a babushka tied around their head and a rather unflattering dark dress and frumpy shoes. They looked like the typical older Russian peasant I've seen in photos. But I noticed they all walked even in the worst weather.
Yes, I suppose our attire could be described as somber. I never really thought about that. I guess I'd call it formal business. Avoiding flashy clothing is really just a cultural preference, though. There's no religious reason behind it.
Ladies don't carry purses to synagogue on Shabbat. Good observation! I didn't know Russian Orthodox don't do that either.
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01-13-2021, 10:01 PM
How do you dress when you go out for dinner?
I once lived a 5 minute, pleasant walk from a synagogue, but my Jewish neighbors did drive there. It was a young family, with two preteen kids. I never paid attention to their church clothing, but when we took them to dinner in China town, they were all dressed up, not much color.
Catholics in Germany wore such clothing to church, too. Neat, bland and unsexy.
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01-14-2021, 03:14 AM
How do you dress when you go out for dinner?
What is this "go out to dinner" thing of which you speak?
Where are we going and why am I in this hand basket?
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01-14-2021, 03:15 AM
How do you dress when you go out for dinner?
(01-14-2021, 03:14 AM)outtathereligioncloset Wrote: What is this "go out to dinner" thing of which you speak?
Hey there! How are you doing?
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01-14-2021, 03:22 AM
How do you dress when you go out for dinner?
(01-14-2021, 03:15 AM)Aliza Wrote: (01-14-2021, 03:14 AM)outtathereligioncloset Wrote: What is this "go out to dinner" thing of which you speak?
Hey there! How are you doing?
Not terrible is about as good as I can go right now. Good days and bad days. Less days where I feel like I'm living in a Jerry Springer episode of Twilight Zone.
Where are we going and why am I in this hand basket?
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01-16-2021, 08:52 PM
How do you dress when you go out for dinner?
(01-13-2021, 09:08 PM)Dancefortwo Wrote: When I lived in Los Angeles I lived in the Fairfax district which has a large Jewish community and there were 3 or 4 synagogues near my apartment. I used to see people walking to the synagogue nicely dressed. They dressed somberly, there was nothing flashy or bright and colorful but it was always neat and nice. I was fascinated because I noticed none of the ladies ever carried purses and everyone walked instead of drove. A Jewish friend (or I should say, a friend who grew up in a Jewish community) told of it being traditional to walk to synagogue and people who didn't live nearby were known to drive their car and park a few blocks away and THEN walk to synagogue ;-)
I would guess they save money on large paved parking lots.
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01-16-2021, 08:59 PM
How do you dress when you go out for dinner?
(01-16-2021, 08:52 PM)mordant Wrote: (01-13-2021, 09:08 PM)Dancefortwo Wrote: When I lived in Los Angeles I lived in the Fairfax district which has a large Jewish community and there were 3 or 4 synagogues near my apartment. I used to see people walking to the synagogue nicely dressed. They dressed somberly, there was nothing flashy or bright and colorful but it was always neat and nice. I was fascinated because I noticed none of the ladies ever carried purses and everyone walked instead of drove. A Jewish friend (or I should say, a friend who grew up in a Jewish community) told of it being traditional to walk to synagogue and people who didn't live nearby were known to drive their car and park a few blocks away and THEN walk to synagogue ;-)
I would guess they save money on large paved parking lots.
The opposite. Many people drive their car to synagogue on Friday night, lock it up in the parking lot, and drive it back home Saturday night.
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01-16-2021, 09:22 PM
How do you dress when you go out for dinner?
Canter's looks good. I nearly went to Ffx once, but the trip (to DTLA) was cxld for some reason.
Is this sig thing on?
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01-16-2021, 11:01 PM
How do you dress when you go out for dinner?
The way it's going it'll be a long time before I go out for dinner again. I'll be wearing a flat cap and trouser braces.
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09-16-2021, 01:35 AM
How do you dress when you go out for dinner?
Naked. More comfortable that way.
Naaah, i never eat out.
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09-16-2021, 01:39 AM
How do you dress when you go out for dinner?
Usually unless we're going to a fancy place with family, casual dress.
“For me, it is far better to grasp the Universe as it really is than to persist in delusion, however satisfying and reassuring.” -Carl Sagan.
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09-16-2021, 02:15 AM
How do you dress when you go out for dinner?
I only wear an Oscar de la Renta on special occasions.
Test
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09-16-2021, 03:27 AM
How do you dress when you go out for dinner?
When we went to our investment company's annual client appreciation dinner (which in reality WE pay for out of the fees), I used to wear a coat and tie. A couple of years ago I just wore slacks, a nice shirt and sneakers (actually Hoka One One, as they hurt my aching, arthritic feet the least). Hey, if that's good enough for the guy who was president and retired, it's good enough for me. Covid killed the party last year. We'll see what happens this year. I have a 50th (51st, as Covid delayed that, TOO) high school reunion party coming up in a couple of weeks. It'll be casual, as far as I'm concerned. At our 20th, it was all suits and ties and shit. I have nobody to impress, at this point. I'm just looking to see who made it this far. At Classmates.com, I've seen several posts about people I knew who are now dead.
If you get to thinking you’re a person of some influence, try ordering somebody else’s dog around.
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09-16-2021, 05:56 PM
How do you dress when you go out for dinner?
I dress lavishly ,expensive tailored Italian silk , flashing my Rolex and finger jewelry, custom made shoes . My trophy wife wearing a plunging neckline designer dress 4" heels flashing multi carrot diamond ring and diamond earrings. We love how people notice us while we totally ignore them .
All I know is that I know nothing
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