Favorite Quotes about Atheism, Agnosticism, And Religion

[Minimalist]

Gibbon wrote it.

The policy of the emperors and the senate, as far as it concerned religion, was happily seconded by the reflections of the enlightened, and by the habits of the superstitious, part of their subjects. The various modes of worship, which prevailed in the Roman world, were all considered by the people, as equally true; by the philosopher, as equally false; and by the magistrate, as equally useful. And thus toleration produced not only mutual indulgence, but even religious concord.

Decline and Fall.........   Chapter II: The Internal Prosperity In The Age Of The Antonines.—Part I.

I have seen attempts to link this observation to L. Annaeus Seneca but scholars who have read through his extant works cannot find it.

[Gwaithmir]

“The ‘nice God’ hypothesis does run into some knotty problems. Take mosquitoes for example. What kind of a nice god would create blood-sucking, disease-spreading needles with wings?” (Daniel C. Maguire) 

[Phaedrus]

[Gwaithmir]

“I was walking along the bank of a stream when I saw a mother otter with her cubs, a very endearing sight, I'm sure you'll agree. And even as I watched, the mother otter dived into the water and came up with a plump salmon, which she subdued and dragged onto a half submerged log. As she ate it, while of course it was still alive, the body split and I remember to this day the sweet pinkness of its roes as they spilled out, much to the delight of the baby otters, who scrambled over themselves to feed on the delicacy. One of nature's wonders, gentlemen. Mother and children dining upon mother and children. And that is when I first learned about evil. It is built into the very nature of the universe. Every world spins in pain. If there is any kind of supreme being, I told myself, it is up to all of us to become his moral superior.” (Terry Pratchett) 

[Phaedrus]

A deity offended by people being human perhaps should lighten the fuck up. ~ Me

[grympy]

A deity offended by people being human perhaps should lighten the fuck up. ~ Me

  I guess that rules out all the Greek and Viking gods. 

A god of the  Abrahamic religions is ascribed infinite attributes. I've long thought it would be impossible for such a god to be either pleased or offended by we talking apes.  Surely we would be to him as ants or mosquitos are to us. 

[M.Linoge]

[Gwaithmir]

“All religion, my friend, is simply evolved out of fraud, fear, greed, imagination, and poetry.” (Edgar Allen Poe) 

[Phaedrus]

[Gwaithmir]

“You don’t have to be brave, or a saint, or a martyr or even very smart to be an atheist. All you have to be able to say is, ‘I don’t know.’” (Penn Gillette) 

[grympy]

“You don’t have to be brave, or a saint, or a martyr or even very smart to be an atheist. All you have to be able to say is, ‘I don’t know.’” (Penn Gillette) 

 Sorry to be noodge. 

Penn Gilette seems  to have confused ''atheism"  with "agnosticism" 

To be an atheist , one need only be able to say "I don't believe" .  To that, I add "I don't know".That makes me an agnostic, or 'soft'  atheist .

[M.Linoge]

[Gwaithmir]

“In Philadelphia, I inadvertently came across a copy of Robert Ingersoll’s essays and lectures. It was an exciting discovery; his atheism confirmed my own belief that the horrific cruelty of the Old Testament was degrading to the human spirit.” (Charlie Chaplin) 

[Phaedrus]

“In Philadelphia, I inadvertently came across a copy of Robert Ingersoll’s essays and lectures. It was an exciting discovery; his atheism confirmed my own belief that the horrific cruelty of the Old Testament was degrading to the human spirit.” (Charlie Chaplin) 

The irony being that Ingersoll identified as agnostic and was even known as The Great Agnostic.

Yet, if you read his works, so much of it simply vibes with modern atheism.

[Phaedrus]

[Phaedrus]

[Thumpalumpacus]

I don't remember who said it, or where I first read it:

"Religion is like a penis. It's nice that you have one, but please don't wave it in my face."

[brunumb]

"Religion is like a penis. It's nice that you have one, but please don't wave it in my face."

The version I have seen is aimed a bit more strongly at proselytising:

"Religion is like a penis. It's nice that you have one, but please don't try to shove it down my throat."

[grympy]

"Religion is like a penis. It's nice that you have one, but please don't wave it in my face."

The version I have seen is aimed a bit more strongly at proselytising:

"Religion is like a penis. It's nice that you have one, but please don't try to shove it down my throat."

From The Devil's Dictionary:

"Reverence: The spiritual  attitude of man to a god and a dog to a man " (Ambrose Bierce )

"Saint: A dead sinner revised and edited (Ambrose Bierce)

"Sermon: Sanctified boredom"  (anon)

[Gwaithmir]

"All the meanness, all the revenge, all the selfishness, all the cruelty, all the hatred, all the infamy of which the heart of man is capable, grew blossomed, and bore fruit in this one word – Hell." (Robert G. Ingersoll) 

[grympy]

"Organised religion is the greatest confidence trick ever perpetrated on the human race " ( Tarquin S Shagnasty)

[M.Linoge]

“Many religions now come before us with ingratiating smirks and outspread hands, like an unctuous merchant in a bazaar. They offer consolation and solidarity and uplift, competing as they do in a marketplace. But we have a right to remember how barbarically they behaved when they were strong and were making an offer that people could not refuse.”

― Christopher Hitchens

[M.Linoge]

[Cheerful Charlie]

Every sect, as far as reason will help them, make use of it gladly; and where it fails them, they cry out, “It is a matter of faith, and above reason.”
- John Locke, An Essay Concerning Human Understanding

[Minimalist]

"When my son survived a car crash I did not thank god.  I thanked Honda."